Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Your face knows

I had a meeting with my boss today. Walking in to the Special Ed department, I choose to be friendly.

"Hi, good morning!" I gush to a coworker.

"Good morning *slight pause* you look tired. Are you tired?"

"Uh, no, don't think so."

Great. So does that mean I look bad? Upset? Tired? Do I have gigantic circles under my eyes that threaten to overtake my face?

As if meeting with my boss wasn't bad I'm wondering about my looks the entire time.

I suffer through my meeting, where the theme is "How is everything? How's it going?"

Is it because I'm new? Or do they think I'm upset? Do I look upset?  Should I have more questions than I do? Do I really look that bad?

Finally back with my tutor (aka friend) in my own building and own office...I now have to ask. Do I look tired?

"No, nope. You look normal."

Okay, what's that supposed to mean?

"It's just have this expression. It's kind of like, hmmm, kind of overwhelmed."

Screeching halt. 

"Ah, what?"

"Well, not overwhelmed exactly. Just, kinda.  Someone who didn't know you might misunderstand..."

"Uhm, I'm not overwhelmed. I mean, I don't feel like I am. I know I look kind of mad when I have no real expression."

"No, not mad. Just, at times. You look like you're busy and have lots of stuff going on."

This conversation never gets any better. So, what i've learned for the day is that I'm tired and overwhelmed. My face got the memo - the rest of me didn't.

Photo courtesy of Stuart Miles.

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